One is greeted on the road with the words: Lungga
kidia, Where to? " and a visitor is welcomed with: "
Wau rauh, Just arrived." These are formulas not to be taken
in their literal sense. A visitor takes leave by asking to be
excused: " Tiang pamit," the answer to which is simply
" Yes," "ingih" There are no other words for
greeting or for good-bye. It is not polite to answer a question
with monosyllables, and one should not point with. The index finger.
It is better to use the words for the cardinal to indicate direction,
but if one must point, it should be with the thumb, holding the
rest of the band closed.
The Balinese are constantly paying visits to one
another, but no one would dream of making a formal visit without
bringing along a gift of some sort: fruit, rice, eggs, or chickens,
given casually and received without a word of thanks. It is taken
for. granted that the present is appreciated by the acceptance
but if one wants to be over-polite, one says: " Tiang nunas",
"want it " or " I like it " (ideh in the common
language) object is banded with the right band while touching
the elbow with the left, and it is received with the same gesture.
The gift-problem became acute for us as we entered
in competition with our friends and neighbors for more and valuable
presents. Someone would arrive with a basket of egg or rice; we
repaid the visit taking a cheap bead-cloth. On the next visit
they came with piles of fruit and even live chicken we had to
rush to the market to buy a batik shirt or a bottles of Javanese
perfume. We generally ended by exchanging brocades krisses, and
so forth for pieces of silk, flashlights, and fountain pens. The
Balinese are very much concerned with the price paid for an object,
and they always insisted on knowing what we paid . for a present,
until we realized that it was a great mistake, to remove move
the price tags. When we bought new glasses or new Plates, Dog,
our house-boy, washed them carefully around the la as not to rub
off the price.
It is necessary to be properly dressed to pay
or to receive a, visit The breasts of men and women should be
covered by a special breast-cloth, a saput for men and a selendang
for women. People in the house always dashed for their breast-cloth,
usually an ordinary foreign towel, when a special guest arrived.
Immediately the visitor was provided with green coconuts to quench
his thirst, with cigarettes and betel-nut. Up-to-date Balinese
like to , offer soda-pop, coffee and Chinese pastries. The chewing
bete]-nut is the first gesture of hospitality and the main social
pastime of the entire archipelago. To chew betel, a piece of the
green nut of the betel palm is dabbed with a little lime, wrapped
in pepper leaves, sirih, and the whole chewed together with a
large wad of shredded tobacco that is held under a monstrously
protruding lower lip. The combination of betel, sirih, and lime
produces an abundant flow of saliva, red as blood, and the betel
addict spits constantly, leaving crimson splotches wherever he
goes. After certain guests departed, our house-boy always -had
to wash the veranda steps because they looked as if a murder bad
been committed on them. Today betel-chewing is not favoured by
the younger generation, not only because it looks so disagreeable,
but because it spoils the teeth. The older the person, the fonder
he is of betel, and the ingredients are always kept on hand in
boxes with little compartments or in special satchels of woven
pandanus. Old men without teeth have a special bamboo tube with
an iron rod to mash the various ingredients together. The sirih,
betel, and lime are presented to guests in little ready-made packages
often beautifully decorated with streamers of delicately cut-out
palm-leaf. They are called tian2ng or bas6h, a gift.
A host must act as servant to his guests, himself attending to
their comfort and not partaking of the refreshments. Meals are
also served by the host, even if he has servants and assistants,
and he can eat only after the guests have finished. If the visitors
come from another village, they are expected to stay for the night
and even for days at a time. The place of honour in the house
is then assigned to them. After a reasonable period of time the
visit is repaid and the presents reciprocated.
Very strict are the rules between men and women.
On public occasions men and women keep to themselves in separate
groups, and people from Gianyar are shocked to see the sexes mingle
in Badung while watching a show. In the same manner the people
of Badung are disgusted because in Tabanan men and women bathe
near together. It is rude to look into a public bath and even
worse to enter it unless to bathe. Then the other bathers become
figuratively invisible. Great courtesy is shown even among people
are intimate and it is extremely unusual for a man to get "fresh
" with a girl in public; should it happen, the man would
be severely punished. Thus a woman can confidently remain in her
house while her male relatives are away at work, and a girl can
go anywhere without fear of being, aproached by a stranger. Girls
of high caste usually go chaperoned. Lovers are particularly careful
not to show their emotions in public.
To neglect releasing a loud belch after a meal
would be taken by the host as a sign that the food was not satisfactory.
In general the Balinese are very frank in actions that would be
out the question among us, such as clearing the throat, spitting,
I so forth. These are perfectly normal actions no one needs, conceal.
But the key to Balinese etiquette among the castes
consists in the language spoken and in keeping at the proper level.
Under no circumstance should a common man stand higher than aristocrat.
If a lowly person has to pass a nobleman who is sitting he stoops
in front of him until he is reasonably far away, and to address
his superior he must squat or sit on the ground clasping his hands
together in front of his chest or over his left shoulder. To retire,
after begging leave, he walks backwards, stooping holding his
bands clasped.